![]() ![]() ![]() During a child's meltdown, stay calm and explain that yelling, throwing a tantrum, and slamming doors are unacceptable behaviors that have consequences - and say what those consequences are. When Kids Are Out of ControlĪs difficult as it may be, resist the urge to yell when you're disciplining your kids. Allow him or her to earn the privileges back by demonstrating self-control. If necessary, discipline your teen by taking away certain privileges to reinforce the message that self-control is an important skill. Urge them to pause to evaluate upsetting situations before responding and talk through problems rather than losing control, slamming doors, or yelling. But remind teens to think about long-term consequences. Ages 13 to 17īy now kids should be able to control most of their actions. Compliment them as they use their self-control skills. Help them to understand that it's not the situation that's upset them - it's what they think about the situation that makes them angry. Urge kids to take time to think before responding to a situation. Explain that sometimes situations that are upsetting at first don't end up being so awful. ![]() Encourage them to think about what's causing them to lose control and then analyze it. Older kids usually better understand their feelings. ![]() Praise kids when they do walk away and cool off - they'll be more likely to use those skills in the future. Encourage your child to walk away from a frustrating situation for a few minutes to cool off instead of having an outburst. It may help your child to imagine a stop sign that must be obeyed and think about a situation before responding. And it's just as important to praise your child for not losing control in frustrating or difficult situations by saying things like, "I like how you stayed calm" or "Good job keeping your cool." Ages 6 to 9Īs kids enter school, they're better able to understand the idea of consequences and that they can choose good or bad behavior. This helps kids improve their sense of self-control. You can continue to use timeouts, but rather than setting a specific time limit, end timeouts when your child calms down. Try to prevent outbursts by distracting your little one with toys or other activities.įor kids reaching the 2-year-old mark, try a brief timeout in a designated area - like a kitchen chair or bottom stair - to show the consequences for outbursts and teach that it's better to take some time alone instead of throwing a tantrum. Infants and toddlers get frustrated by the large gap between the things they want to do and what they're able to do. Here are a few suggestions on how to help kids learn to control their behavior: Up to Age 2 But with self-control, your child can understand that a temper tantrum means you'll take away the ice cream for good and that it's wiser to wait patiently. Helping Kids Learn Self-Controlīy learning self-control, kids can make appropriate decisions and respond to stressful situations in ways that can yield positive outcomes.įor example, if you say that you're not serving ice cream until after dinner, your child may cry, plead, or even scream in the hopes that you will give in. Teaching self-control is one of the most important things that parents can do for their kids because these skills are some of the most important for success later in life. But parents can help kids learn self-control and teach them how to respond without just acting on impulse. When kids melt down in the middle of a crowded store, at a holiday dinner with extended family, or at home, it can be extremely frustrating. ![]()
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